Journal

DIY: How to Sheat that Strong Shit!

If you are like me, then you’re one of those people who do not find it necessary to drink water while eating until you’re done; and only if you remember. May I ask, why do we even do that?

Because the consequences involve slow digestion, bloating, constipation and in the long-run, strong shit. Really strong shit (especially when you ate eba, rice, yam, beans and any kind of swallow at all), the type with the deviance of an unabortable child. And if you are unlucky, you might, in trying to force it out, have prolapsed haemorrhoids, (a painful condition where moist, pink pads of the internal body are pushed out while trying to force faeces out) commonly known as piles.

I spent a large part of last week feeling the urge to excrete but having the inability to, simply because I was experiencing this horrible condition. I would sit on the toilet and attempt to stool but would end up crying out because of the excessive amount of pain I felt. When a little did come out, I spent the rest of the day being unable to sit properly – my asshole was hurting so bad. I held in that shit (pun intended) for almost two days!

When I had had enough, I decided to stop trying and have a hot bath. It was here that I got my miracle!

It’s simple, really. As I was bathing, I thought I had the urge to excrete again so I sat on the toilet. When nothing happened, I decided to just wash down there and continue bathing. As I did, I noticed that the thing was, on its own, deciding to come out. With little effort, it began to. Seeing the effects the hot water was having, I decided to try again and the same thing happened. I repeated the process till I felt a million-dollar relief.

If you have had a baby around you before, you would notice that old women use this method on them when they want them to poop while bathing them.

So there! When next you feel that strong shit being stubborn, you know exactly what to do πŸ˜‚.

PS: If you’re wondering, there’s no such word as ‘sheat’. I just didn’t want to repeat ‘shit’! πŸ™„

All images from Google.

27 thoughts on “DIY: How to Sheat that Strong Shit!”

  1. You smart smart human! I swear, I go through that a lot and I unfortunately do have piles….so, I’m bound to take lots of water or I have to swear in a *insertsBadWord Babylonian language πŸ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Lol.πŸ˜…
    I know this feeling!
    Sometimes the shit will come out half way and then it will refuse to come out all the way or go back in. It just wants to stress someone’s ass hole.
    I remember one of my classmates jumping and praying in the toilet cus the shit didn’t want to move after coming out half way.(she had mixed garri and Milo and chewed. That was enjoyment in boarding house sha but she didn’t drink water).
    Did she we learn after that experience? No.
    Thanks for the tip!😁

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Great technique in dealing with “ceased shit.” Thanks for sharing. It sounds funning, but it is applicable to real life.

    Liked by 1 person

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